Like any other society, small community, tribe, secret society, or cult, being a member of a CrossFit box involves learning the CrossFit language and understanding the social norms of your environment.
It takes time, of course, but the sooner you learn, the easier it will be to avoid being “That Guy,” or in this case “That Girl.”
The Super Six “Don’t be that Girls”
This girl got the memo and got off her knees!
6. Spin Class Junkie Girl
You’re the girl who gets stressed out when a purely “strength” day shows up. After class you ask questions like, “Are we doing a cardio workout today?” When you discover that the coach thinks 5 heavy sets of 10 back squats, as well as strict pull-up work, some heavy good mornings, and some GHD posterior-chain supplementary work, is enough of a workout for everyone else, you take off to do a spin class to get your “hit” for the day. Don’t be that girl.
5. 80% Rule Girl
You’re the girl who instated a rule that she must show at least 80% of her skin on her body no matter the weather. There you are in Thunderbay, Ontario, in minus 30 degree weather, your snot frozen solid in your nose, yet you insist on wearing a sports bra. Don’t be that girl.
4. Sit on Your Wallet Girl
You’re the girl who tries to put your membership on hold because you’re going away for 4 days and won’t be using your gym membership during the long weekend. You’re also the girl who has never bought a roll of tape in her life. After all, you only ever use a small strip for your wrists, and others are always happy to lend it to you. Don’t be that girl.
3. Magic Number Girl
You’re the girl whose shoulder press is 65 lbs. Your push press is 65 lbs. So is you clean and jerk, and your snatch, and your back squat. 65 lbs. is your magic number because 75 lbs. just sounds too heavy for you. You also have a “magic band” for pull-ups. You’ve been ready to graduate from the thick purple band for months, but you prefer the rubber between your legs. Don’t be that girl.
2. Undisclosed Knee Injury Girl
Your the girl who develops knee pain every time running is programmed. Instead, you like to hang out on the rowing machine whenever you’re asked to run up the hill. Don’t be that girl.
1. Occasional Celiac Girl
You’re the girl who announces you’ve been diagnosed as celiac and claims to have begun a 100 per cent gluten free diet. Months later, you’re oddly pudgy for following a perfectly clean diet. And when Friday night roles around and you’re found drinking beer and asked if it affects your gluten intolerance, you ask, “There’s gluten in beer?”